Life is not (just) the sum of my choices

I was washing the dishes when this well-known phrase popped into my mind – life is the sum of your choices. The entrance of that thought was completely random, but it got me thinking.

Is life the sum of the decisions I make, of the things I chose? Because really, I hope it isn't. Because I make silly decisions sometimes, or maybe, a lot of the time.

It's true that in some ways, we "choose our own destiny" by deciding to work hard, eat healthily, be positive, study arts instead of science, believe in a God or not, start a friendship, marry someone, and more. These decisions affect the outcome. But they are not the only things affecting the outcome.

More important than my choices, are the people. You may think we choose the people in our life, but actually, we don't always. There are some we choose, but there are many others whom we don't.

Like our parents, for one. We didn't choose them, but they chose to have us. Teachers – they choose to teach and nurture us. Friends and mentors – those who have stuck by us in our stuck up and down moments. Even enemies – they choose to hate us ha ha (but honestly).

I may make a decision, but people are part of it every step of the way, and when I succeed or fail, people cheer me on or get me back on my feet.

This isn't being pompous. What I am saying is that people around me make up my life. They are the ones who influence me, provide for me, shape me, criticise me, believe in me... these are the people who made and make me who I am today. I would not be here if not for those people. People who model the way, guide me in decision-making, sometimes stop me from making bad decisions, and sometimes let me make bad decisions anyway, and love me still.

So for me, life is not the sum of my choices.

More than that, life is the sum of my relationships.

^ Some of the relationships in my life: Family ^

^ And new family ^

Thank you all and You for being being the sum of my life, for making life count!

†